Stapler (Song)

Stapler is the real song written by Juno.

Lyrics
(Spoken)

[KING OLLY]

Bind them

[STAPLER]

(Barking)

[BOWSER]

Hey! That’s the thing! That’s the thing that turned me into… this!

Mario… you GOTTA win this one!

(Sung)

[KING OLLY]

Your journey is ending

And your efforts are feeble

You will heel, you will fall

With the rest of your people

Gaze into darkness

The fangs of submission

The hubris of paper

Leads only to perdition

[BOWSER]

Can it, ya twerp!

Unfold me, ya jerk!

Even I, a pro villain

Wouldn’t do this kind of work!

[KING OLLY]

Short-sighted and foolish

But to be expected;

And now, to my pup

Your attention be directed

Impressive, is it not?

My perfect little pet

A pristine pedigree

The brightest I could get

It can sit, fetch, shake

Roll over and other things

But its most impressive trick’s

To hail the Origami King

[BOWSER]

BAH!

That’s your plan?!

To sic your dog on Mario?!

He will bounce you, and trounce you

Believe me, I know!

[KING OLLY]

You talk far too much

But I’ve already won

With your army in my palm

My conquest is done!

Soon, you will join the princess

Shaped into a perfect form

Soon, all the world will bow

Be bound by steel to a new norm

Soon, fanged shackles lock

Your kingdoms in my folded war

Soon, those who dared defile my soul

Shall be no more!

(Spoken)

[KING OLLY]

Patience, my pet. They will join the ranks of the Folded Soldiers soon enough

[BOWSER]

HAH! As if I’d ever bow to YOU, ya little RUNT! If I had my hands right now, I’d STRANGLE you!

[KING OLLY]

Bold words, from a glorified name tag. It’s only a matter of time until your resistance is quashed

Sic them

(Sung)

[KING OLLY]

Fall to the chains

In King Olly’s name

You will bend all the same

And submit to my reign

The staples will lock you

In forms that I choose

With no princess to lead you

Your kingdom will lose

[BOWSER]

Oh, SHUT YOUR DANG PIE HOLE!

You yap on and on

But if I know my nemesis

He’d never be your pawn!

You cut up my kid!

Even I’M not that mean!

But the plumber will SQUASH you

Ya purple drama queen!

I know Mario

He’s stubborn as a mule

He’s gonna snap in half

Your stupid office tool

For many, many games

I’ve FELT the hurt he brings!

So I know he’d never hail

The Origami King

[KING OLLY]

You underestimate the power

Of my stapler’s binds

You’ll be fastened and chastened

And the world will be mine!

Its howls at the moon say

You are out of time

You will not stand in the way

Of my vision sublime!

Soon, you will join the princess

Shaped into a perfect form

Soon, all the world will bow

Be bound by steel to a new norm

Soon, fanged shackles lock

Your kingdoms in my folded war

Soon, those who dared defile my soul

Shall be no more!

[STAPLER]

(Barking)